She is having nightmare

Janelle can't really have a good sleep in our room, she either cries in her dream or wake up suddenly n scream/cry non stop.

Last night we exchange room with my mil. And janelle had a good night rest. Hmm. Is there something in my room?


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My MIL stupid idea

This morning, I told my mil that janelle can call "papa".

Then guess what she says:

她 to Janelle: 多事，不要叫爸爸，叫叔叔。
我: 你讲什么话？
她 to me：叶师父批菁宣冲父母，不要叫爸爸妈妈，叫叔叔婶婶，不要多事。好不好？你自己想想看。

Pianz, she herself is a mother and says this kind of words. I just walked away and dont want to argue with her. Angry.

She better dont ask me to have 2nd child, i will definately shoot her back... give birth also cannot own the child, what for... wait long long for more grandchild. angry.

Seek for 2nd opinion

Today took a day off and bring janelle to see private doctor for 2nd opinion.

We went to see Dr X from Mt E's Singapore baby Clinic, the comment recived from him is the same as what Dr Y in KK hospital given to us. The only feedback i received from him is up the doze and monitor and ensure no breakout of seizure. And he is kind of concern with Janelle's gross motor. He did an assement and he concluded that she is at the stage of month 4 and she is slower by other baby 4 months or more. He recommended me to highlight this to Dr Derrick Chan in KK.

Then we went to see a chinese 医师 at serangoon north blk 154. Best, when we first went in, once we seat down, he starts telling us that have to watch out this child without us saying any thing. He says her airway wasnt good and she is a person who scare of hot and sweat alot but her nose is sensentive and easily catch a cold. When we told him she got fits, he says she got fits because the oxygen cant get to her brian and she got a shock and ended up with fits. Not epilepsy.

We even went to a fortune teller at JB, he says she is definately not having epilepsy as she dont have such illness showed in her life. ask us to seek for more opinion.

each saying different things. But i really hope she is not having epilepsy and maybe just some not well taken care which caused this.

4th tooth is out.

Yes, today my sil spot janelle 4th tooth while playing with her.
no wonder she keep hitting herself.

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A day at work

After 3 weeks of urgent, I have to returned to office to sort out all admin issues with my boss. So I went back office.

I got my approval to work from home for a year till my girl is able to go school. Feel very blessed to have such a team. They have put in extra hrs to my work. Was great.

At abt 6pm, when I was abt to reach home, Kogan called, ask me to come home immediately cos mom cannot take care of her. Jx had been crying. Once I reached home, the first word from by mil was "u better quit ur job n stay home to take care of ur girl, I don't know to take care." haiz.

Spend 30min to settle her down to sleep. Then my mil came in and say she pat her ask me go n bath n have dinner. Once I'm out of bathroom she is crying. Goodness seek. And janelle starts to have seizure. My mil was too afraid to stay home to see these, she went over to my bil place to sleepover. From 6.30pm till 1.30pm, jx had total of 10 seizures. I started to gets very worry, and wanted to sent to kk but Kogan says don't need, cos what they do also monitor.

Guess janelle was just overtired. I carried in my arms n pat her to sleep till 3am. Not easy to be a mom. Everyone can give up but mama can't.


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Janelle discharged

After 2 weeks in hospital, finally janelle can be discharged. Now she is at home resting.


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Infantile epilepsy

Doc C had classific janelle as infantile epilepsy. And she is put on long term mediciation. How long is long? It will be a min of 1 year. And if the drug can fully control which means no more episode for a year then doc will consider to lower the doze and slowly come to a stop.

Not sure why my girl have such illness? Not from family. I have been very careful during my pregnant. No idea why.

My mil fall ill for a week after janelle is admitted to hospital cause of scare and not enough sleep. She was blaming herself when we suspend is food. Now she back to her own self, pushing the blame to me. She even complaint to my dad that is my fault, saying i don't know how to take of my girl. I let her scare by the thurder. Pianz. And she keep saying that their side family has no such illness and pushing blame to us and saying I eat banana during my pregnancy n cause janelle has this illness. I already very stress in hospital and with her keep pushing the nlame to me, how long more can i take? I so so regret that I didn't insist of moving out before getting married. This kind of mil should be keep a distance away to be a hi bye relative will do.

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Waiting game

Now we have stopped all antifits medicine and waiting for seizure to happen. Till now she got 10 seizures. Omg. That's scary.

We have put her back on medicine. Hopefully can control.

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Kogan fly off

This morning Kogan fly over to shanghai for work. Will be back only on Friday night. Hopefully by then we can discharge.

Mummy alone in hospital. Kogan ask the maid down to help, but I preferred she stay at home to take care of my mil who has down with flu n fever.

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14th days in kkh

Ai yo. Guess I'm the pr of kkh. 2weeks alr. Kogan make a big fuss over the add on medicine over the weekend, now dr derrick used another approach. We moved to bed 13 ward 86, stop the medicine n put janelle to 24hrs EEG n video cam to catch her seizure. Find out the cause, then decided on what teatment to give. Guess I will be still here for another week.








My poor girl. Mummy is tired.


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Janelle refused to sleep till now

Janelle woke up at 2 am, and refused to sleep in till now 5am. Give her milk, songs, time to be alone, all don't works. She keep turning here n there and with the angry lion sound. Kogan was so angry cos his sleep is affected. He blame it to the new drug n give the nurses n doctor a hard time. Poor thing.

Ok mama now going to catch some sleep.


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Tried new medicine

After taking phenobabiton (not sure the correct spelling, a med to control fits) for a week but janelle is having fits. From her blood test, this med alr on her max doze hence not able to increase it. So dr C add on 2nd anti fits med. Yesterday night was the first night on this med, janelle parttern change. In the night after her 7pm milk, I gave her the med, and after that she gets very excitied. She laughted with us, but her body is restless. Refused to take milk at 10pm n was kind of cranky. At abt 10.30pm, usually I will tight her in her bed n let her sleep on her own. But yesterday, her eyes are closed but crying. Just can't settled down. I worried is because if the new med, hence I called the mo but he says is not because of the new drug. Maybe is other reason. Haiz. Stupid. Janelle only settle in at abt 12am. And she woke up at 6am, gave her milk, she only takes 20ml. Worried worried.

Kogan don't really like giving janelle new med. He say there will have more side efforts. I really don't know what to do, stop seizure is the priority isn't it? Need to stop seizure but not taking drug. I asked him how? He just reply pray to god then. I nearly fainted.

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Thanks aunty amanda n aunty Jessica

Thank you aunty amanda n Jessica for dropping by kk hospital to see me n bought me toys.

Sorry Aunty amanda, I preferred My fingers more than your bear. But I will listen to the music every time before I fall asleep, it helps bringing me to sweet dreams.




Thanks aunty Jessica for the zebra. Though it bring my mom some confusion whether is Ryan a horse or a zebra for a while. Hee.
























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11th day

Managed to get a slot for EEG test after dr chong make some arrangement on Tuesday.

Yesterday when we was abt to discharge, janelle had a min seizure at abt 11.20am. As a result, dr need to readjust her dosage n we have to continue to stay in hospital n monitor.

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Janelle progress

Today is the 8 day in hospital after her first seizure.

Till todate, we still have no idea of the cause of the fits. N kk hospital do not have any
slot for EEG n MRI. HaiZ. now we are in hospital monitoring her. We can only discharge if janelle don't have any seizure in the next 24 hrs. Her last episode was yesterday evening at abt 6pm. Her eyes up rolled, n stiff for 5 sec and was awake from sleep.

Now what I can do is to pray hard for every

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Be a stay home mom

Kogan n I had a chat.

We think that mil is not able to take care of janelle anymore. So the best person to take of her is me. And in order to take care full time, I will need to give up my job be a full time stay home mom. Of cos, if I quit my job, the car is the first to go. Though to have a car around is good, but the maintainese is way too high. And properly the maid is the next to go.

Yesterday night Kogan talk to her Sis n bil abt this. Bil gave me an idea to work from home. But looking at my current work load, I certainly think I can't cope. Sis told me to resign, don't need to worry abt money. She will help me pay off our car n house loan. Haa but we certainly don't need her money on this.


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3rd teeth

During evening clean up, we found out that janelle had her 3rd teeth out. :)

Not sure if the fit are caused by this teething?

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Janelle month 6 week 1 to week 4 photos

Some photos with janelle that taken weeks ago. Don't have the time to post it. Till now while janelle is taking her morning nap.

When janelle is 6 months

Mummy giving lunch













Naughty GuGu put on a tatoo for her. When Kogan saw it, scolded her mom as the colour is harmful to the skin. The next day, it was removed.













Cute cute janelle on spec













Uncle bob drpped by on Sunday night 29 march 2009:












Smart smart janelle knows how to use her hand to stop the pacifier from dropping off













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Nightmare

This is the 3rd night, I woke up from nightmare. I saw janelle fitting in my dream. Woke up from shock in the middle of the night. Hope this will end soon.

God bless janelle, please.

More tests

More blood sample was taken for metabolicism test, the result was alright. Also lambar pucture, nw waiting for the result.






And dr choong the senior consultant of ward 86 started janelle on oral medician. We need to stay in over the weekend to ensure the med can control the fit.

Today janelle blood pressure had been in the low side. Not sure if it is because of the med. Will check with the doc tml.

Janelle admitted to hospital again

Janelle had admitted to hospital again. Haiz. She was alright this morning. Drinking milk, cleaning and even played with me till LOL. At abt 10am she shows her sleeply sign, I took her to my room, close all window n door to prevent dustrub, switch on the fan, gave her a bottle of milk. Place her down to the bed after milk and she fallen asleep by herself. I'm so proud of her. No more sarong baby. But at 11am, the first fit of the day occurred. I turned her to the side, n shouted for Kogan. Forget Kogan went for his medical check up. I scoped janelle up side way n ran to the nearby clinic, before we reached the clinic, she woke up n starts to cry. Dr lee wrote us a referral letter n we head down to kk immediately.

When in kk, janelle was back to self and she was playing with the dr n nurses. DrR discharged he saying that she think there us no value to keep us in the hospital unless there is another fit occurred. She scheduled janelle for EEG in 2 weeks time n discharge us. On our way back home, at 12.45pm, the 2nd fit occurred, this lasted for 4mins n wake up. We make a uturn and head down to kk again. At 12.55pm the 3rd one hit again. We are about to reached kk. This lasted for a few second and happened when she is falling asleep. And we admitted to hospital once again.

At abt 4pm, another fit hits again. We are in the ward, shouted for nurses n dr. DrL wintnessed the fit. This one lasted for abt 20 sec, n back to sleep. She was so sleepy n fallen asleep for abt an hr.

At abt 6pm, she was given feriblexxx (can't remember the full name, need to check with e nurse later) n fallen asleep on daddy lap. 6.15pm, Kogan removed her pacificer n wanted to give her some porridge. The 5th epi happened again. Btw Kogan place her down on the bed, it was gone n janelle fallen asleep.

Mummy mummy u have to be strong ok. Only if u r strong then ur girl will be strong. Haiz.

Kogan n My guess of these fit is because of food. In hospital, she ate what the hospital gave n she was alright for 2 days. Only when she was discharge, n my mil gave her dry scallop porridge n she had fit the next day. I did checked with drO ( prev ward consultant) she says not likely. This time round, I get my sil to talk to my mil. Stop giving those food to baby. When i say her she angry, scolded me saying I didn't know how to take care of children. Don't know how much porridge I have throw away. Don't know how much she gave behid my back. Should I be a stay home mom?

Janelle can discharge today

Yes. After monitoring in hospital for 36hrs, n janelle had no fit, n she can discharged. All the test done for her are alright. No idea what is the root cause. Nw we have to have monthly follow up with kk to ensure no further serious.